The Most Amazing DUI Loophole We’ve Ever Seen

See this smokin hot blonde? Her name is January Jones, and she stars on the AMC hit show Mad Men. Last night, she was involved in a car crash when her Range Rover struck 3 parked cars. She left her license with a witness at the scene, and went home on foot, claiming the paparazzi was harassing her and she couldn’t handle it. She returned to the scene of the crash 45 minutes later, in fresh clothes, and chewing gum. A witness said Jones smelled of alcohol.

Here’s where the story gets interesting:

We’re guessing 80% of the time someone crashes into multiple parked cars, they are drunk. It’s an assumption, yes, but sober people don’t usually hit non-moving objects. Jones claimed she was being chased by the paparazzi when she lost control (aka the Princess Diana defense), but, suspiciously, there are no immediate crash photos. All the photos at the scen were taken hours later, blasting that theory to bits. The only logical solution left is that she was drunk. But January Jones seems to have, either accidentally or on purpose, discovered one of the biggest DUI loopholes we’ve ever seen. To quote TMZ:

The witness at the scene tells TMZ she was face-to-face with Jones and smelled alcohol on her breath.  The witness says Jones left her driver’s license with another resident and left.  She returned 45 minutes later in a different set of clothes, chewing gum.

The witness says she asked cops if they were going to administer a field sobriety test, but a cop told her there was no point since she could have had a drink at home and there was no way of proving she was under the influence when she was behind the wheel.  Cops confirm there is no way to pin drinking and driving on someone who leaves the scene and comes back.

As for being chased by the paparazzi … none of the witnesses we spoke with saw any photogs at the scene, and no pictures have surfaced that show the scene immediately after the crash.  The pics you see in this post were taken many hours later.

Are you fucking kidding me? If someone crashes their car and leaves, then comes back drunk as a skunk, they can’t be pinned with a DUI? How is that possible? And now that it’s made news, California citizens are going to use this incident as an instruction manual of how to get out of a DUI. Only in Hollywood…..

[Source: TMZ]