This little post was found on reddit, the funnel through which much of the strange and crazy auto content flows. Commenting on the picture above, his page simply says “Found this trench two weeks ago, and it got the better of me.” I assumed he was trying to drive down it and got twisted up. But the picture below showed me he had a different idea of what it means to “conquer” it.

The caption for this second picture says “Came this weekend for Round 2.“, with the picture below showing you how well it worked out.

The final quote says “One day I will make it.” Again, I’m not sure what defines, “making it.” Crossing, or driving up or down; that makes sense. And getting some serious 4×4 lean can be exciting, but it seems clear this trench wants nothing to do with you, and might not be an “obstacle” that can be overcome while driving on the door handles. I guess he wants to defy the laws of physics and drive sideways, like a gecko walking on a glass patio door. The fact that that analogy is applicable should tell this guy he should let this one go. More pictures here.

 Last week we sat down and looked at all the cars we had driven in 2011. It was a great year at The Smoking Tire. Though we hadn’t driven hundreds of cars with a team of only 1.5 journalists (Matt and Zack) we did pretty well, driving at least 60 cars. Some were used in episodes, some for written reviews and some were from Matt’s work on “The Car Show.” We decided to break them into 3 categories: Sedan of the Year, Truck/SUV of the Year, and Sports Car of the Year.

After coming to an agreement on the Sedan and Truck/SUV of the Year Matt chose the Sports Car of the Year. He drove everything, so he would be the best judge. LIES! We locked in our votes and then posted a contest for all of you: Whoever picked the same 3 cars we did before midnight on New Year’s Eve would win a t-shirt. It’s now January 1, 2012 which means it’s time to reveal our choices for Cars of the Year, as well as the contest winners.

Sedan of the Year: Mercedes Benz E350 Bluetec

Some of you were expecting the CLS63 AMG. Others lost their free shirt betting on the CTS-V wagon. We considered those, but a super-sedan is really a sports car wearing a fanny pack. You want a sports car, get a sports car. But if you want the best sedan on the market today, get a Mercedes E350 Bluetec.

We all fell for this car on a 1,600-mile drive to the California/Oregon border and back. The challenge was to drive from the Mexico border to Oregon in one day, the entire state of California, on one tank of diesel fuel. Clean diesel cars are fairly new to America and their fuel economy usually exceeds what’s advertised, so why not? The car had to fight stop-and-go traffic, 94-degree heat, mountains, several stops (for the camera truck to re-fuel), the weight of 3 full-grown man-boys, their camera gear and a slow-cooker plugged into an inverter that spent 6 hours roasting a brisket. Despite all that, we went 784 miles on a single, 21 gallon tank of dino juice, averaging 38.5 miles per gallon, better than the dismal Lexus CT200H Hybrid, a car so bland we completely forgot to put it on the list, even though we drove it just 3 weeks ago. A big part of its efficiency is the incredible 0.27 cD, which for the non-technical among us, means it’s just as aerodynamic as a Prius, and doesn’t look awful.

But it wasn’t just the fuel economy that hooked us; this car is the total package.

If it takes 100 miles to get to know a car, consider this a former spouse. You want to test an interior, spend 14 hours straight in one, then 10 hours the next day. It is one of the most comfortable we have sat in. The massage seats are better than those in the $400,000 Bentley Mulsanne. The engine is almost silent on the road yet has 402 torques that make accelerating or passing a breeze. It handles well for its size, the 7-speed transmission is repsonsive, the interior is nice looking and easy to use and it has a night-vision system which is as helpful as it is frigging awesome. I’m 5’11″ and after 10 hours in the back seat, I wasn’t the cranky, short-fused jackass I was expecting to be. Mercedes simply got many many things very right.

This car also brought us to the agreement that unless you’re getting an AMG (or similar performance car) and driving it, hard, all luxury cars should be diesel. People equate off-the-line torque with speed and it has that in spades. Few E550 owners ever use all the power and RPMs their cars can provide, so why not get something a little more frugal (something rich people secretly love). Stylish, aerodynamic, comfortable, silent, and efficient, the 2011 Mercedes E350 Bluetec is what a modern sedan should strive to be.

SUV/Truck of the Year: Ford F-150 EcoBoost

I’m betting a lot of you were expecting the Raptor to be here simply because we drive one all the time and love it very much, while writing in the review of the 2011 Raptor that it’s the best truck ever made. While the Raptor is our choice of transportation when the apocalypse comes in 2012,not to mention the one Matt wrote a check for, we’re objective enough to give credit where it’s due: The Ford F-150 EcoBoost is an incredible leap forward in the truck game. The 3.5L twin-turbo V-6 makes 365HP and 420 torques at only 2,500 RPM. Compare that to the Raptor’s 6.2L V-8; 411 HP and 435 torques, but not until 4,500RPM, which are on Premium fuel compared to the Ecoboost’s regular octane. Point: EcoBoost.

It also has the same towing capacity as the V-8 trucks, up to 11,300 pounds, so you can pull logs in slow motion through a muddy work site all day long. I don’t know why you would, that’s just what the commercials tell me you people are up to. And of course, the cream on top is the fuel economy: 21MPG highway. That’s only 1MPG less than the non-turbo V-6, and only in the 2WD trucks (the engines get the same MPG in the 4×4 trucks). With a 34 gallon tank, the range is 756 miles. That same trip means 2, more expensive, stops in the Raptor. Point: EcoBoost.

The EcoBoost outsold V-6 trucks from all of it’s competitors combined; more than 100,000 units. The last time Ford sold that many V-6 trucks was 1985. And lets not forget the comfortable, well-equipped interior. The seats in the top trim levels are nearly the same as our Raptor, and they are some of the best seats I’ve ever sat in, period. The media systems are great; Sync (at least the version the F150s and Mustangs get) is still best in the business, and there’s room and storage everywhere. Ford clearly thought things out, paying attention to every piece a person could use, touch or sit on. You put that interior onto a smart, powerful-yet-efficient platform and you cannot lose.

Bottom line: A tuned version of this engine in a Raptor would earn another check from Matt in 80,000 more miles. Raptors rock, 10 mpg doesn’t.

Sports Car of the Year: Porsche 997.5 GT3 RS

Of all the cars we’ve driven in the three categories, this one was the hardest to choose. I mean, just go back and look at that list of sports cars: Supercharged Lamborghini, 640 HP Corvette’s, a Mustang that handles like a German car, and the BMW 1M, the best car to come out of Munich in over a decade. All of them are incredible, and we’ve been very fortunate to get behind the wheel of these amazing machines. But I thought long and hard about this (read: the length of 1 massive Spider Wreck bong hit followed by 1 Camel Light cigarette), and one car stands out as being so completely over the top with driving excitement, it had to be recognized. We understand that this isn’t the newest, fastest version of the GT3 RS, as that honor goes to the new 4.0 version with 50 extra horsepower, but we’ve never even seen one of those in person, let alone drive one. Trust me, the 3.8 works just fine.

When you see a GT3 RS parked on the street, it looks like a full-on race car. And for good reason: it only weighs 220 pounds or so more than the actual 911 Cup cars, and most of that is mandatory street equipment and basic interior panels. There are no buttons on the steering wheel. The seats don’t recline, because if they did, you wouldn’t be driving properly. You’d think the radio would sound terrible, but it doesn’t. I know because I used it exactly one time. You may as well throw it out the window, because the 3.8L, 450 horsepower flat six sounds as close to its racing version as I’ve ever heard on a road car; add a basic cat-back exhaust and it sounds identical. It revs up like a literbike, and when it comes on cam, I just about came; on cam. I found the above picture by looking up “Direct Steering” on Google. Even on public roads, I found myself braking later into corners than I ever had in my life. The handling was so good, cameraman Tom Morningstar made a girl puke twice on a Sunday drive (thankfully she exited the car first). People use the term “bolt action rifle” to describe the perfect shifter. I’m convinced the gun was designed to mimic the car’s feel, not the other way around.

I was fortunate enough to spend a week with the GT3 RS while filming The Car Show back in May. We procured it for the purposes of running the Mojave Mile, where I went 166.3 mph. Just a few months beforehand, Richard Hammond of Top Gear used the exact same car for their American supercar road trip film, and nearly wrecked it at VIR, but he loved it.  We originally tried to get a Turbo S, which would have been the right decision for the film, as a Turbo S in attendance ran 182.7, but it wasn’t available, and I don’t care. Standing mile numbers notwithstanding, (the giant wing couldn’t have helped), this car was fast. 450 horsepower pushing around just 3020 pounds is ridiculous. Sure, the 4.2 second sprint to sixty may make you roll your eyes compared to Supercharged Lamborghinis or magical AWD computer-aided launches, but passing at highway speeds? Forget it. Every highway is the Mulsanne Straight when you’re in a GT3 RS.

That week was one of the best driving weeks of my life. I went 15 mph faster on the way to the runway than I did on it, and have never felt a car so planted at those speeds. Thank you, downforce. I spent 12 hours and 2 tanks of gas in the canyons one day. And I used the GT3 RS for daily driver errands, too. You’d think that the most hardcore, barely street legal race car available from Stuttgart would be rough, noisy, and generally unpleasant on the street, but the opposite was true. Even on rough pavement, the GT3 RS was totally bearable. The trunk and empty space normally filled with a hilariously un-usable back seat holds a surprising amount of stuff, provided it fits in between the (again, non-folding) seats to get there. The air conditioning, aforementioned radio, and ounce-shaving cloth door pulls do their jobs just fine. And it’s easy as pie to parallel park. Sure, the clutch and shifter are a bit heavy for the daily Los Angeles commute, but odds are, if you own, or are even considering owning a GT3 RS, you’ve got that situation handled.

Some of you may be disappointed that we didn’t choose everyone’s favorite, the BMW 1M Coupe. We loved that car, and I mean really had an amazing time driving it. It’s fantastic. But the GT3 RS is cut from the same cloth; a limited-edition, wider, faster, racier, yet somehow still practical version of an already high performance car. The difference is, the RS starts at a much higher level. These two cars are both incredibly brilliant. But at the end of the day, there has to be a winner. And the smile on my face while driving the Porsche at, frankly ludicrous speeds simply can’t be matched by a BMW 1-Series, even if it is the fastest, best handling, most fun 1-series ever made.

The Winners: Unfortunately, no one was able to guess the exact same cars as us. I know the list was long, but I thought someone might have. However, shoutout to user The Nik, who got two out of three, the Porsche and F-150 Ecoboost. For being the most right person in a sea of wrong people, The Nik, email Matt your address and we’ll send you a TST shirt.

Do you have trouble fitting strippers into your busy lifestyle? Have you always thought the one thing missing from camping was the dancing form only fatherly neglect and a handsy uncle can inspire? No more! Introducing, the Platinum Stage Hitch Pole. Take the strip club with you! Made of sturdy stainless steel or classy brass, the Platiinum Stage Hitch Pole has a 3′ x 3′ platform and a whopping 7 feet of usable pole!  The stainless steel is easily cleaned, allowing multiple performers to perform Olympic-caliber clitoral hangs without sharing the Hanta virus. The 200lb weight limit prevents those 10AM  “C team” applicants from crashing your party.

Boring commute? Not anymore! Your rear-view will only be filled the sight of a beautiful girl humanoid swinging her (adams apple…uh oh) hips to the sound of tire  noise. Own a strip club and want to find out if that new 18.00001 year old is committed to the cause? See how she does at 80 MPH (do not attempt) with truck horns blaring. IF she’s still there when you get back, you know you found a truly damaged soul willing to do anything for approval and sticky bills  winner. And let’s not forget, stripping is now an acceptable form of exercise! It’s the gym that comes with you! Call today! Make the jump for the video and special features!

*Stripper not included. Individual results may vary. The allure of the Platinum Stage Hitch Poles is not limited to attractive women. We are not responsible for ocular damage resulting from any “aesthetically unqualified” persons dancing on said pole. Possible side effects of purchase can include but are not limited to: losing $500, FUPA-sightings, nightmares, lost valuables, co-signing a lease with that stupid skank Vikki,  vehicular-hepatitis, shame, blue balls, glitter poisoning, ODing on Red Bull, deportation, family exile, whorish daughters, having shit stolen by hoes and Affliction-wearing. Do not allow  women to dance behind your truck on the freeway.

This gave me a laugh, but these will probably sell like hot cakes. For only $500 you can have the ultimate accessory in the flat-billed hat clan. I went to the REMIX/Drift event at Irwindale last year, and the biggest attraction was the stripper pole mounted on the back of a short semi. Surrounded by what I call The Un-Fuckables (morbidly obese, pre-adolescents, auto journalists and fathers of questionable taste) several women, sporting more makeup and self-inflicted scars than a Twilight autograph line hyper-gyrated to NOS-fed techno. To be able to recreate that scene for only $500 is way too tempting for way too many people. Pismo, Havasu, Daytona, these will be the new habitats where the Platinum Stage trees will take root and flourish. For a fun game, count the number of these that go untouched, especially by anything over a 6. My guess is most of them will be eligible for a never-touched refund.

- Zack k

This past weekend I went to Lake Tahoe, and during the 4 days I had there a theory I have had for years was nailed down with depleted-uranium nails driven onto a board made from magnetic diamonds and covered in amber; 99% of the SUVs on the road are unnecessary.

There is no better place to witness and understand the uselessness of the SUV than Lake Tahoe in the middle of winter. You see, over the holiday weeks that span Christmas and New Years, everyone who’s ever been drawn to the snow, be it a hardcore 50-year ski veteran or a family of 4 from San Diego taking their first ski trip, is there. That means the diversity of the vehicles on Highway 80 heading over the mountains is as diverse as the LGBT support group at an international Hostel in New York. For better or worse, the highway going over the pass is a smattering of lifted trucks, pathetic chain-shodden Prius, rusting 4x4s, AWD cars and way too many idiots from the bay who put 22s on their 4wd truck, forcing them to put chains on. The equivalent of buying a tiger to look badass but having it de-clawed and it’s teeth flattened. You’re quite the pimp until someone breaks into your house and leaves with all your money and a new rug.

My vehicle for this trip was a 2006 Volvo V50 wagon with AWD and a turbo-charged inline 5-cylinder. It impressed me more every day. It had Continental All-season tires on it. No Blizzaks fitted with ninja swords like you find in CO, just a good set of tires meant to handle all conditions. And they did. The weight of the car (and it’s cargo) and a good AWD system was all we needed to go up/down our icy driveway, slalom around stranded motorists and barge through 10 inches of fresh “Sierra cement.”

It got good gas mileage, felt more stable than anything I’ve driven in the snow, and just worked wonderfully. And when you get it in the dry it drives great. And as we cruised up Highway 80, eventually coming to a stop for chain control, I took a look the cars around me, and wondered why we still buy SUVs with the idea that on our yearly trip to a snowy place, they will easily and safely transport us to our weekend chalet, making up for the added cost and bad fuel economy we deal with the other 360 days of the year.

On this trip I saw several accidents (none life-threatening), but my favorite was a brand new, virgin-white Chevrolet Suburban with it’s back wheels in a ditch on the right side of the road. This was particularly impressive because it was on a very very gentle RIGHT hand curve that followed a straight as long as Texas. This road was as hard to maneuver as the line to buy your lift ticket. But somehow Johnny Igotmesum-Fourwheeldrive spun his land-yacht the opposite direction of the turn and like an 85 year old man on the toilet, dropped his Michelin balls into the icy cold water that is a ditch. Bravo.

Aside from 2wd trucks/SUVs, I don’t have a problem with the cars themselves. I owned 3 different cars in my 9 years living in Colorado, and driven dozens of others that were borrowed from friends. Some were well-suited for the winters of that state, and some (a borrowed 1982 Chevy Citation) had no business being on the road in mild humidity, let alone snow. But what you notice is that no matter what people drive, they get where they’re going and in a timely matter. The only time the freeway came to a crawl is if a car flipped over, or there were simply too many Carhart-clad, goggle-tanned bros trying to get first tracks. You could be behind an 82 Cutlass with all-season tires and be comfortable that the driver knew what he was doing.

You think this is the same as your Crossover SUV. It isn't.

The problem in California, is everyone buys an SUV and thinks that when they sign on the dotted line Harry Potter comes down from heaven and farts into their mouth, giving them iron-clad stability on the road no matter what. So what you end up with is a bunch of idiots that have never driven on anything slipperier than a polished parking garage heading up to the mountains in their new Grand Laredo RX450 Titan with the optional Stabilitrakular system. They can sync their phone to their kid’s DVD player and have every Crate & Barrel store programmed in their GPS, ignorant to the reality nothing substitutes for knowledge and skill. I don’t care how many TV screens your new “truck” (which is likely built on a car platform) has, it doesn’t make you invincible.

You would think this would result in Joe Tahoe driving 80mph in the snow, one hand on the wheel, his figurative snow-cock growing by the mile suddenly sliding over a rail and tumbling to a chilly death in the lake below. I wish. That would provide a cautionary tale to others while opening up a lane. The problem is the second people notice it’s a little slippery, reality hits them; “I’ve never driven in the snow. Oh Jesus. Maybe there’s some valuable information in the Dora the Explorer DVD I have playing on my 4 TVs.” So people revert to a timid crawl of 5mph, putting along in fera while I sit behind them filling the car with so many curse words my Dad has to roll down the window as if we all just downed a Taco Bell Party box.

When you’re uncertain, slower is better, I get that, but when I see someone in a big truck, capable of plowing through mud and 2 foot snow drifts driving slow enough to get passed by a local 6 year old on Big Wheel, I want to turn into Michael Douglas in Fallen and shoot holes in you “Ultra-AWD” badge. If you want a good all-season car, why not choose one that gives you all the safety and grip you could want while saving you money and shutting up Green Peace?  I understand there are people that need big trucks for work, or towing; fine. I don’t, my mom doesn’t and that lady at Starbucks on her way to a HOA meeting to discuss mail box colors damn sure doesn’t.

The lesson is nothing can substitute for know-how and skill, so why try to supplement those with the letters “S-U-V”? Next time you’re shopping for a family hauler that’s snow ready, test drive a wagon. It will drive better in the dry, and handles snow fine. After all, if Ezra Dyer can take an Audi R8 grocery shopping in the snow, you’ll be fine.

-Zack k

I’ve heard that some Raptor owners don’t actually use their trucks as trucks; that they just drive them as cars, and then use them for off-road shenanigans. Now, I completely understand that, since, from the factory, the Raptor has a body-color painted bed and they don’t want to scratch up the paint. Fortunately, I went for the dealer-installed Linex bedliner ($400), since I plan on actually using this thing as a truck to haul my crap around in, not just a camera car or off-road toy.

This past weekend, I participated in an amazing event known as the 48-Hour Film Project, here in Los Angeles. Teams are randomly given a film genre, character name, and line of dialogue, and they have 48 hours to write, shoot, edit, and submit a film. Our genre was “Femme Fatale,” our line of dialogue was “I have no idea,” and our character’s name is Jessica. Our team, Eat at Dino’s Productions, made a 7-minute film about a female assassin who’s last job is to kill her own sister. I can’t post the movie online until after the screening, but it’s safe to say that no other team in this contest will use full-on CGI, explosions, glass shattering, and blood splatters to the extent that we did. There are no fewer than 6 graphic murders in 7 minutes of film.

My role in this film was simply to be a Camera/production assistant, contribute creative ideas when I had them, and provide the grip truck to carry all our gear around in from place to place. I did play a murder victim, strangled while getting into my Corvette, but the shot was eventually cut for technical reasons.

But about the truck’s usefulness as a work truck: it works great. Although the load height is a few inches above a normal F-150′s, it’s not high enough that loading 60-lb cases of camera gear are remotely a problem. When loading gear in and out by yourself, the “man-step” is absolutely invaluable. Make fun all you want, but when you have to climb in and out of a truck 100 times in a day, this is the best option box you could ever check. Here’s all the stuff we were able to fit into the Raptor’s bed:

2 Monitor Cases

10 C-Stands

Rolling Dolly and Hardware

Cooler of Water

10 Hundred-foot extension Cords

5 Directors Chairs

3 Cases of Lights

2 Camera Cases

3 Apple Boxes

1 Prop Crate

4 People

If the stuff wasn’t so clumsy and oddly shaped, I’m sure we could have fit more, but when asked the question, “Can the Raptor be used as a Grip Truck?” The answer is most definitely, Yes.

For those of you interested in seeing our film, Allure, the screening will be held September 24th at Laemmle’s Monica 4-plex, 1332 2nd Street, Santa Monica, CA, at 9:30 PM. Would love to see some TST fans out there.

On June 5th, 2010, I bought a 2010 Ford SVT Raptor 6.2L from Galpin Auto Sports. This wasn’t just on a whim, as I had been lusting after this truck since we borrowed one from Ford to drive on the 2009 Bullrun Rally. On that trip, we learned that, not only does the Raptor have more off-road capability than nearly every other car currently in production, but also it makes a fantastic daily driver, with levels of comfort, storage space, technology, and luxury that are on par with some of today’s best luxury cars. When we decided we needed a daily driver and camera vehicle for The Smoking Tire, the Raptor seemed like the only logical decision. Of course, I waited for the 6.2L engine to arrive, since you can’t make that extra 100hp in the aftermarket for less money than the $3,000 upgrade from Ford. 9 weeks and 3,500 miles later, here’s what we’ve learned about the best sport truck money can buy.

As we continue to use the Raptor for its intended purpose, shuttling our crew and all our gear to shoots, it becomes immediately apparent how good this truck is. Even without the Super Crew configuration, we can fit 5 people in the truck in total comfort, while using the bed for the gear. Or, if need be, we can fit all of our gear into the back seat of the truck, if we need to lock it up safely. The seats are supremely comfortable for any distance, and so far, I’ve spent up to 8 hours a day in the drivers seat of the truck. Remember, this is 3,500 miles in 9 weeks, 3 of which the truck didn’t even leave the driveway, while we were on Bullrun.

The multimedia interface is the best in the business, hands down. It has tons of useful features that I actually use, such as the fuel price finder and live weather map, and nothing superfluous that I don’t need. I was never a fan of voice-activated systems before, but a few days with SYNC, especially when paired with the screen, and I do pretty much everything by voice commands now. It can even understand me at freeway speeds with the windows down. The only downside to the system is that twice so far, it has sent me down dirt roads that don’t seem to lead anywhere. Maybe the truck is trying to tell me something.

My Raptor is no pavement queen. Although yes, in daily duty it doesn’t leave the streets of Los Angeles, we made a point to get it dirty early and see what it can really do. So Autoblog.com photographer Drew Phillips, along with 2 friends, accompanied me out to El Mirage for a little shakedown session and photoshoot. Everything the 5.4 Raptor did in the dirt, this truck does better. With 4×4 mode engaged, and the differential locked, we easily hit 95 mph on a dirt/gravel trail, on the first pass. This truck truly is the Nissan GTR of off-roading; it’s almost too easy. Leave the diff locked and go back into 2WD, and drifting corners is an absolute breeze, totally predictable. Even with 4 people in the car, and the air conditioning on, radio blasting, and the outside temperature approaching 105 degrees, I beat the snot out of it on the trails for an hour. It never missed a beat.

One of the problems with the 5.4 Raptor was that, with its relative lack of power, the transmission would often hunt for gears, and kick down a gear at the smallest throttle inputs. It wasn’t a deal breaker, but it wasn’t ideal either. The 6.2L version has much more power, and the transmission has been re-calibrated to allow for some in-gear acceleration before it kicks down. With 411 hp and 440 lb/ft of torque, in daily driving, the truck never has to downshift to keep up. By switching on “Off-Road Mode” in the dirt, the entire powerband of the truck is shifted higher, so instead of making big torque down low like a street truck, it makes big power up high like a race truck. Amazing what software can do with an engine, even a naturally aspirated, relatively low-tech V8.

The Raptor comes pre-wired with four Auxiliary switches on the center console just forward of the shifter, and I wanted to hook up something, anything to one of them, just so I would have something else to play with. So we hardwired the Valentine One to Aux4. It works, and I now feel cool flipping the switch.

People have asked me a few times how I plan to upgrade my Raptor, since I have a bad habit of turning every car I own into a race car. The answer is, I don’t plan on upgrading this truck at all. I really think SVT has done a really good job with it, and with my 100,000 mile Bumper-to-Bumper warranty and 100,000 mile maintenance plan included, I can use the truck for its designed purpose without having to worry about voiding my warranty because I had to have that extra 20 horsepower. It doesn’t need it, and I like being covered. I do plan on driving this truck for 100,000 miles at least, and I already have one obnoxiously loud sports car.

I do have a couple of gripes, albeit minimal ones. Why is the driver’s window the only automatic one? When I put down the windows, it’s almost always the front 2 windows together, and there’s no point in having just one automatic window. For almost $50,000, I expect at least both fronts to be automatic. In fact, if anyone knows of a software upgrade for this, please let me know. Also, because both Tom and I drive the car regularly, and he’s much smaller than I am, I wish the driver’s seat had a memory function. It’s full power, of course, but considering how different our settings are it would be a nice treat to not have to reset everything all the time. ** I’m an ass. It does have seat memory, and I’m just a dumbass for not seeing the buttons. Thanks, Jamal. ** Of course, the fuel economy is positively terrible. I’m not at all surprised by this, and if you care about that sort of thing, you shouldn’t be buying a Raptor anyway, but it’s noticeably worse than the 5.4 model. Over those 3,500 miles, I’m averaging 11.6 mpg. For reference, my old H1 Hummer would get 13 (on diesel). Nevertheless, the tank is at least big enough that we can go 340 miles per tank on the highway.

Speaking of highway driving, when you’re on the freeway, you have to pay constant attention to your speedometer. Because of the smooth Fox suspension and tall ride height, you have no clue how fast you’re going. 30 mph feels like being parked, and 85 mph feels like 50. I have accidentally crept up to the truck’s 100 mph limiter without even realizing it, and gotten road rage for people driving slowly in front of me, only to look down and realize they are going 90, and so was I. Fortunately, the Raptor’s brakes are much better than you’d expect from a vehicle this size, and panic stops aren’t a problem at all. Neither is handling, surprisingly, and our friend Jamal, who runs shit over at SVT, tells me the Raptor will handle 0.85G on the skidpad. Impressive numbers for a truck with 35″ off-road tires, and a number I completely believe.

What’s interesting about the Raptor is that, unlike a Hummer, everyone loves it. When I owned my H1, the only vehicle out there that is really comparable to a Raptor in terms of off-road performance, people hated it. They kicked it, spit on it, keyed it, left me angry notes when I would park it places, and generally glare at me for being a wasteful asshole. The Raptor, on the other hand, is close enough to a regular F-150 that most “normal” people don’t notice it, and people who do know what it is, positively love it. Even though the fuel economy is awful, and it’s painted bright orange, it doesn’t carry the Hummer stigma, which is a huge bonus.

I’m going to keep this series going as we continue to go on adventures with my Raptor, and until then, enjoy these amazing photographs of my truck taken by Drew Phillips of Autoblog.

Is there something specific you want to know about the Raptor 6.2L? Leave a comment and we’ll answer your questions.

Every show needs a camera car, right? Well here it is, Matt’s new Ford SVT Raptor 6.2L. Back on the old show, Matt said that his next car purchase would be a Ford SVT Raptor. True to his word, the new 6.2L beast is now at its permanent home here at The Smoking Tire HQ. Expect the truck to appear on video soon…. Initial impressions and photo gallery after the jump.

Initial impressions:

- The 6.2L , 411 hp/ 434 tq engine has tons more power and torque than the 5.4L does. I got a ride in one back in January and didn’t notice much as a passenger, but as a driver, you can really feel the lower torque band working around town

- The re-calibrated transmission is worlds better than before. It doesn’t hunt for gears as much, and allows for some in-gear acceleration before kicking down a gear to pass. The extra torque really helps with this too.

- The truck is deceptively quick. It doesn’t feel fast while driving it because of the very high driving position, but 90 feels like 45, and 35 feels like crawling. This is also partly to do with the great suspension.

- The newest version of SYNC is fantastic. The voice-recognition is spot-on and reaffirms our position that this is the best multimedia system available in any production car.

We will keep you posted in our “Raptor Diaries” as we put some real miles on this bad-boy. For now, enjoy the photos!

The Long Beach Grand Prix is really an amazing event. Four different races (Indycar, ALMS, World Challenge, Toyota Pro/Celebrity), and dozens of practice and qualifying sessions over a weekend is nearly overkill, even for the biggest car fans out there (read: me). After a few days, even the most badass Aston Martin prototypes seem less interesting. Fortunately, there was no shortage of cool trucks in Long Beach, which brings me to these bad boys; the coolest trucks of the Long Beach Grand Prix.

Chip Ganassi Racing, with drivers Scott Dixon and Dario Franchitti, brought out the coolest race trailer tow vehicles of the day, three matching International LoneStar semi trucks. The LoneStar is the Mini Cooper or Harley Davidson of Semi trucks, with no fewer than 50 customizable options (including a wet bar and hardwood flooring), and the most aggressive looking front end this writer has seen in a while. The trio seriously stopped me dead in my tracks. Even though the LoneStar has been on sale since late 2008, these are the first examples I’ve seen in the flesh. That may have something to do with the $350,000 price tag.

Racetracks are no stranger to cool emergency vehicles, and this H1 Hummer is right up there. LAFD actually brought out two of these identical H1′s, and although they don’t carry water or hoses, they do hold many of the supplies that the fire department needs for general first-aid when surrounded by several hundred thousand drunk people. It’s an H1 with a light bar, which makes it a winner for me.

Speaking of winners, Juicy’s Outlaw Grill is the biggest winner of the day, because this semi-truck is the world’s largest smoker. The gigantic trailer/smoker/awesomeness is capable of cooking 700 turkey legs and 100 briskets AT ONCE. The four-foot aluminum walkway surrounds the smoker, so employees can get easy access to meats-in-progress. According to one employee, the truck is able to serve 10,000 people in a single day. Judging from the orgasmic smells coming from this thing and the crowds around lunchtime, they may have accomplished that goal.

Celebrity cars are all over LA. Some are beautiful, others very plain. But sometimes they just make you shake your head. The car in the picture above is actually Candy Metallic Pink. (I think the color broke the camera on my iPhone.) It belongs to the MTV VJ LaLa. Instead of wasting my words here, why don’t you guys tell me what comes to mind when you see something like this?

- Daniel Volz

Who doesn’t like a badass-looking lifted truck? Sure, most of the ones we see are driven by tattooed jackasses that stand at 5 feet 3 inches and like to season their pizza with HGH, but the trucks still turn heads. That 5 year-old part of our brains that endlessly played with Tonka trucks and BIGFOOT models in the mud never completely goes away. So when I saw this truck, less than 50 feet from the swanky Ivy Restaurant of Bevely Hills, I had to cross the street to check it out. At first it looked like a normal 4-door short bed with a good lift kit; black truck, black wheels, yada yada. But something peaking over the roof caught my eye. What is that black, angle-cut cylinder poking up from the bed? Is it a tow hitch? The tip for Kim Kardashian’s lipo machine? No. It is the exhaust tip to end all exhaust tips. Fart cans of the world, this is your god. If you own a Nissan Altima, with an “R” badge and 6″ coffee can muffler, you are no longer leader of the idiots. I have seen plenty of trucks with the semi-style “smokestacks”, and while stupid, at least there was a connection. Semi-TRUCK, pickup-TRUCK. A thin connection, yes, but a connection nonetheless.

Here however, there is no connection. This pipe belongs on top of a house, or a giant cruise ship, or perhaps it could be used as a tunnel under LA for a subway system. It’s so big, even Shaq could drop a free-throw in there. I wonder how often this guy has to chimney sweep garbage out of his exhaust before he can go to work. Seriously, if I lived on his block, there’s no way I could resist stuffing  a cantaloupe in there. Like a fat girl with a pretty face, this truck is a waste of potential.

Does it run on coal?

I checked. Fully functional.

Make your truck growl with a Ford F150 exhaust from AmericanTrucks.

Welcome to Bizarre Road Trip Sightings, where we cock our heads, laugh, cry, or just stare at strange cars found while on road trips. This time, we found a guy who can’t seem to figure out how to properly use a trailer.

From TST friend Vinny Russo.

Got a Bizarre Road Trip Sighting? Email Matt@TheSmokingTire.com

Welcome to Bizarre Road Trip Sightings, where we share strange vehicular occurrences spotted while on road trips. This week: a Ford F-150 with an exoskeleton! This has got to be some kind of creation for a movie or something, possibly Death Race or an upcoming Mad Max remake? Or it could be the burliest of camera-carrying vehicles for the movie biz, given its flat-black treatment. Apologies for the blurry photo, it was taken by my girlfriend off the back of a motorcycle at 80mph. Know the origin of the exoskeleton F-150? Let me know, at Matt@TheSmokingTire.com

*Edit* Dan The Intern discovered that this F-150 is a hollywood camera car that was famously used in the Ferrari chase scene in Bad Boys 2. Good work, Dan.

Roll in style and comfort with Ford F150 truck accessories from AmericanTrucks.

The Smoking Tire heads out to Las Vegas for the 2009 SEMA show, where all the major aftermarket and custom manufacturers show up with their latest goods. Host Matt Farah shows off the Best Truck, Best Sports Car, Best Motorcycle, Best Low Rider, Best in Show, and of course, the Worst in Show.

Last week, a friend mentioned to me that his first “automotive love” was lowered trucks. Being strictly a car guy, I have never looked into the world of pickup trucks, stock or aftermarket . I have always thought that 85% of the pickup trucks on American roads are driven simply as a commuter vehicle that maybe haul the fishing boat a couple of times in the summer and suck a little bit more gas.

My friend, however, enlightened me to very specific breed of dumped (i.e. lower than low) trucks out on the roads today. Trucks such as these are a very dividing thing; truck guys will say they are a waste of a good truck (I beg to differ, check out the one towing the F40! -MF), car guys will wonder why you didn’t just buy a car and drop it. Think what you will about these examples, but I present to you a small collection of dumped diesel duallies. Very cool, in my opinion. – Ryan Maki

Drop your truck low with Ford truck suspension parts from American Trucks.

The Smoking TIre meets up with Samuel Hubinette at El Toro Marine Air Base for an autocross lesson. The problem is, the Corvette was in the shop so we had to use a Semi Truck.

Protect your gear from the elements with a Ford F150 tonneau cover from your aftermarket F150 authority, AmericanTrucks!